Saturday, September 24, 2011

Hello everyone...I'm back!!

I am back and I am going to stay on top of things this school year.  Jackson has started his second year of preschool and I started my second year back from maternity leave.  I look at him everyday with amazement.  When I ask him to squeeze me during a hug he does it and I feel intense love and happiness.  However life isn't always that sugar coated and divine.  We had a great first couple of days and we ended the first week with a bang.  Literally!!

Let me preface this with a statement...I am feeling bad for myself right now...I know there are people out there that have it worse, wars, homelessness, no jobs...but just once I would like to NOT feel guilty about feeling bad for myself.

I'm not going into any details but I got into a car accident that left me with some minor burns and bruises and driving a rental until who knows when. There I said it...wah wah...I know.  I missed my friend's bachelorette party and bridal shower (the last of my very good girl friends to tie the knot) and I have been feeling bad for myself (insert minor tears here). 

School isn't even a month in and they are already talking about decreasing positions for my grade next year...and because I was lucky enough to be able to take a year of maternity leave my seniority has gone down, leaving me with a very unsettling feeling until that list comes out again.

So yea, I'm feeling bad for myself right now...I would love to turn this post around and say, "But after writing all that I see how much good I really have in my life."  Listen I know there is greatness in my life but today just for a little bit I want to feel bad for myself and not feel guilty.  You know what?  You can allow yourself that too if you want.  It's hard to admit that sometimes you just need to focus on you, whether it be the good you are feeling or the sadness you are feeling.  Is that okay with you guys out there?

I guess what motivated me to write this was an article I read in Redbook about women/ mom bloggers who turned their crafty blogs into confessionals about their alcoholism.  As I read the article and their honesty I felt tears coming down my cheeks.  The stories these women shared on their blogs touched me, their bravery, and honesty was refreshing.  The article went on to show the connection that these bloghers had through their struggles, triumphs, new sobriety, and immense love for their families. It showed how they all found each other and were each other's support.

SUPPORT that is why I had started this blog in the first place...So moms who are, or were, or going to be in the same situation as myself could feel like they were not along.  And so I felt guilty that I haven't been keeping my blog up to date with the blame of being a full-time working mom who watches way too much reality television.  Did I mention that my computer is now housed in the basement so my son could have a play room, but wait I have a lap top so that is not a good excuse either. HA! So there I'm feeling bad for myself and guilty for not keeping my blog up to date. But I have gone back and read this this post a couple of times and edited it and you know what?  I'm feeling better.

Omphalocele moms let's support each other one day at a time, one blog post at a time, and one story at a time.

Sorry to all those great omphalocele moms who had to wait for me to email you back but I am here to say, "HELLO" blogHER world...I am back.
OKAY, now I feel better!

See you all soon,
Omphalocele Mom

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